Tea parties, Lairs and Legolas
by GypsyMagick
Summary: Blind Itachi, Ramen muffins and a Legolas loving Orochimaru. Random story thought up when I was in an exam. Sorry for the bad summary.


_Erm well I was doing my exams, got bore and thought of this. Because I don't fell like studying history or maths I decided to type it out now. Remember I was bored and tired when I thouth of this. So if you do review, be kind! Please??!! If the plot is like someone elses, then I'm sorry but I didn' realize. But as far as I know, it's not and I didn't steal it. Lol. Thanks!_

Disclaimer: I don't own anything….unfortunately. But one day…..

**Tea parties, Lairs and Legolas.**

It started out a normal day in Konoha. Team Kakashi went to train. Sakura sat "meditating" under a tree, inspecting her nails. Naruto was bouncing up and down trees. Sai was drawing god knows what and Kakashi was….well what do you think he was doing?

At Orochimaru's lair, Sasuke was pacing up and down, and up and down, and up and down with a pained look upon his face. He was trying to think.

At the Akatsuki's base there was a lot of commotion.

"Itachi and Kisame, you are to go to Konoha and lure the demon child here. At once!" Leader said.

"Yes leader",Kisame said. Itachi looked at where he thought the Leader was. They left the room, Kisame ignoring the fact that Itachi bumped into corners and lightly felt for his arm.

"Itachi what should I wear? That black one or…this black one?"

"Whatever" came the reply. Kisame looked at Itachi and took off the pink fluffy hair band Itachi had just tied his hair with. They left the lair.

Back in Konoha all was quiet, unless you moved toward the training ground team Kakashi was in. Sai was getting hit by Sakura for dropping ink on her bandana. Naruto cheered Sakura on. Kakashi ignored them, reading his favourite subject, Maths. Ok not maths. Something else he shouldn't read in front of 15 year old lest they get ideas into their empty heads.

When Naruto was bored, he went wandering in the trees that were there. There he met the big, bad shark and the man who speaks volumes without using his voice.

"Argh!" Yelled Naruto

"Argh!" Yelled Kisame

"……!" yelled Itachi

"Aha we caught you" Kisame said

"Yeah..uh who are you?" Naruto asked

"We are the famous Akatsuki. We have come for you. You are now our prisoner and we will take demon out of you" Kisame explained

"Good. About time someone came for the bloody fox. All he ever does is moan and I am sick of it. You can bloody well have him. How will you take him?"

"Um a jutsu.."

"Cool. Afterwards can you teach me the jutsu?"

"You don't get it do ya kid?"

"Nope. What will you do with him when you take him?"

"We will use him to rule the world"

"Oh ok. No wait!! You can't do that. It's mean"

"But Leader-sama told us to"

"So if he said to jump into a fire, would you do it?"

Kisame looked at Naruto," Yes"

"Oh. Well I can't let you take the fox to rule the world. I will fight you for it"

"We must take you to our lair"

"I won't go" Naruto said stubbornly.

"We have ramen" Itachi said. Naruto's face lit up

"How much ramen?"

"Lots. But you only get it if you come with us"

"I can't come now, but tomorrow will do"

"Here's a map" Itachi gave him a piece of paper. Kisame looked at the paper, took it off Naruto and switched it with the real map. "We will await you at one in the afternoon."

He and Itachi left. Naruto ignored the fact that Itachi hit a branch.

"I'm gonna get some ramen. I'm gonna get some ramen. Right, tomorrow I will leave at 11ish and get there at 1ish. I eat as much as I can, Skip all the way home and bring the leftovers with me. Um did I say skip? I mean jump in a manly way. Yeah." Naruto said going back to the group.

Meanwhile at Orochimaru's lair, Sasuke was still pacing and thinking. There was now a groove where he was pacing.

Itachi and Kisame had already arrived at the lair and had given the news out.

"Excellent" Leader said, rubbing his hands together and walking to his study. Deidara jumped up and ran to the kitchen. He then rushed back in.

"What type of muffins do I make? Vanilla, Chocolate, Strawberry, Banana or Lime?" He asked

"No one cares. We're gonna kill him anyway so don't waste food" Kisame said

"Go away Deidara"Itachi said looking at where he thought Deidara was.

"But I need to know. Maybe a mixture of them all?"

"How about Ramen flavoured?" Kisame asked sarcastically. Deidara gave a whoop of glee.

"That's an idea" he rushed of into the kitchen to start making the muffins.

"Don't forget the ramen!' called out Tobi. Sasori rolled his eyes. Itachi glared at where he thought the kitchen was.

"Blind as a bat" Kisame muttered.

In Konoha Naruto was packing to begin his journey. He had loads of containers for the ramen, just in case.

With Sasuke, all was now decided. He would go and kill Itachi tomorrow.

In Orochimaru's bedroom, Orochimaru was asleep. Kabuto was watching him sleep, humming a lullaby.

The next day dawned nice and sunny. Everyone got ready to go about their duties that day.

Naruto left at 11, heading towards the Akatsuki lair.

Sasuke left at 10, heading towards the Akatsuki lair. As soon as he left, an alarm went off.

"What is that noise Kabuto?" Orochimaru asked.

"It seems our Sasuke has left the lair" Kabuto said, making toast.

"No! My Precious Sasuke! Don't leave me! Precious!! Gollum" Orochamru yealled out dramatically.

"Ok no more Lord of the Rings for you"

"But Legolas is hot!"

"Definitely no more for you"

"Dammit"

At the Akatsuki lair all was prepared for the capture of the demon container.

"I've got you now, and your little dog too" Leader said

"Dog?" Konan asked

"Fox. I said fox" He snapped at her. She raised an eyebrow. "Shut up."

At 11 both Sasuke and Naruto arrived at the same time.

"Teme?!"

"Hn. Dobe"

"Whatcha doing here?

"I'm going to avenge my clan by killing-"

"Voldemort".

Sasuke looked at him. "No by killing-"

"Galbatorix"

"NO! By killing-"

"SAURON!!"

"NO! SHUT UP AND LET ME FINISH! BY KILLING-"

"I thought I heard your voice Sasuke. It was always so squeaky and loud. Too bad mother found out when I tried to drown out the sound by stuffing cotton wool down your throat when you were 2."

"Itachi"

"Yo how's going?"

"Bad"

"Aw come on. It's not that bad. At least you never had mother nagging at you to clean your room." He looked at where he thought Sasuke was.

Before Sasuke could say anything, Kisame came out looking for Itachi.

"Itachi? Itachi? Where are you? Don't wander off. Last time you fell into a ditch. Remember? Itach- oh there you are. And Naruto you have arrived. Great. Ah Sasuke right? You look just like your brother."

"Has he come to join us for the tea party?" Tobi ran out

"Tea party? I thought I was gonna get ramen."

"You will, Deidara made ramen muffins as well as ramen chocolate"

"RAMEN!"

"Will you join us brother?"

"Ok" Sasuke shrugged.

They went it.

"AHA! Gotcha!" yelled out the Leader, "You are mine"

"No offence but he is mine" Sasuke said

"Oh but-"

"Mine"

"What about the fox?"

"Take him"

"But to take him I have to kill the blonde one"

"Deidara?" asked Tobi

"No. The boy"

"Well you can't have him then"

"Dammit"

"Tough"

"OY!! The ramen and tea and hot chocolate and muffins and cake and sweets are all ready to be eaten. I will not be happy if it all goes to waste" Deidara yelled

"We should go in before he bursts a vein" Itachi said pointing towards a room. Kisame grabbed his hand and pointed it in the correct direction.

"Hey Sasuke, you coming back?"

"Might as well. Orochimaru's boring. All he ever wants to do is whatch the lord of the rings and play with his figurines. And Kabuto sits there watching him, making hot chocolate. Creepy"

"Ok. Cool. So we'll leave after the party?"

"Yeah. But first I have to tell Itachi Orochimaru still thinks of him, especially at night. Kabuto isn't too pleased about it."

"Yeah. I also have to invite them for a tea party at my house next month"

"Am I invited?"

"No"

"What!"

"Of course you are teme"

"Hn dobe"

And they all lived happily for some time, except for Orochimaru who was grounded from watching his beloved Legolas until he cleaned his room.


End file.
